Return to Civilization - Toddler Tee

Somewhere past the last bend of the Jungle Cruise, the jungle stops being scenery and starts being a coworker. This one is hand-drawn in the style of a mid-century expedition badge: a weathered ship's wheel, a sun-bleached pith helmet, two crossed machetes that have clearly seen a workday, a python who has made the helm his own, and a hippo surfacing just close enough to be a problem. The tagline reads like a luggage tag, but anyone who has floated past a bathing pachyderm knows exactly what it means. Printed in jungle green, aged gold, and river-stone gray, with enough detail to reward a second look and enough restraint to wear on a Tuesday. The right people will spot it from across the queue and say nothing, which is the entire point.