Found it. Dad says hi from the garage 😂 If you came from my post you know the family lore. Fifteen years of Salem Octobers, one father still defensive about The Night He Beat The Rush In One Direction Only, and a phone full of everything I've learned so you get the good version of this town without paying the beginner tax. Here's what you're actually up against this year. Salem turns 400 in 2026, and October was already absurd before the anniversary. Over a million visitors descend on a city of 45,000 across one month. The Hawthorne sold out its Halloween packages in January. Remaining October rooms release in weekly batches, go inside days, and carry two-night minimums with non-refundable deposits. Peak nights average hundreds of dollars, and the internet is full of confident advice about a Peabody train that literally does not exist. Winging it stopped being an option a few years ago. Most people just haven't been told yet. This kit is the being-told. 📖 The Survival Guide — where to actually stay (Salem vs Peabody vs Beverly vs Boston, honestly compared), the free satellite parking and shuttle system explained like a human, the Beverly train trick that skips Salem traffic entirely, Halloween night's completely separate rules including the garage closure that got Dad, the 9am walk-up ticket releases that beat the panic-bought coach tours, where locals eat when Essex Street is sixteen deep in witch hats, and the real history told properly, not the costume version. 🧮 The Where-To-Stay Calculator — pick your dates and the town you're weighing up, and it shows you the realistic total cost both ways plus the actual best route in for that exact date, including a hard warning if you've selected Halloween night itself. It does the maths people argue about in the comments. ✅ The Trip Prep Checklist — one printable page, booking through to Halloween night rules, so nothing gets discovered standing in a crowd at 10pm. Verified correct as of this summer, with free lifetime updates, because Salem confirms its parking and shuttle details fresh each season, and when they change, your kit updates free. Forever. ⚡ Instant download. 📱 Works on everything. 🔄 Yours for every October from now on. One kit. Costs about 5% of a single peak-night hotel room. Saves you the room you didn't need, the tour you panic-bought, and the garage story your family will never let you live down. [Get Salem in October: The Survival Guide – Instant Download] Spend the savings on a good dinner. Tell them Meg sent you ❤️